Election Section
Review of the Debates, A Poem: By PETER SOLOMON
With the friendly assistance of the late Edward Lear:
The Scowl and the Democrat went to see
Who could get most of the vote.
They took lots of money, pots and pots of money
more than either one could tote.
Scowl looked straight at the camera and said
in a voice lke a rusted guitar
“Ter-ror-rists, terrists, we want them all dead
But you Dems are weak-kneed, you hesitate.
We hate
to wait.
That’s why I am the best candidate.”
Said Dem to the Scowl, “By fair means or foul
I’ll kill them deader and quicker too.
I’ll not only fight terror, I won’t make the error
of going in unprepared like you.”
“You voted against us, left us defenseless
you’re always changing your mind, you.”
“Not true!”
“Is too!”
And the air turned a rancorous blue.
On such evidence, we choose presidents—
who’s best in tone, in carriage—
has good platform style, a one-liner file,
is most quick to disparage.
The content is thin, and subject to spin
and served up with a runcible spoon
Now play your roles, go to the pollls
and hope for a happier tune
and soon
real soon
and hope for a happier tune.›