Features
FIRST PERSON: Glasses!
I believe it was Dorothy Parker who once famously stated: "Men seldom make passes At girls who wear glasses."
Does this explain why I'm still an old maid of a certain age, or, as my dear mother delicately put it, "a maiden lady?"
As one who enjoys a brisk morning walk along Dana and Telegraph Avenue, I try always to wear glasses and carry a folding cane. But yesterday I stubbed my toe on a crack in the sidewalk, and would have landed forward on my kisser, were it not for a Good Samaritan (and a strong one) who grabbed my elbow and sparred me a nasty fall.
So I praise the dear lord for giving us glasses (which, of course, we constantly lose).