Columns

ON MENTAL ILLNESS: Environment and Journaling

Jack Bragen
Friday March 30, 2018 - 05:50:00 PM

Most persons who've been hit with a psychiatric diagnosis aren't in a position to dictate the conditions under which we live. This is a hardship, because many environments we may live in aren't favorable to recovery. 

Most inpatient psychiatric wards aren't peaceful places with caring and kind treatment professionals; they may be noisy, crowded places often with treatment professionals who are mean, forceful, and nasty. We may have to attempt our recovery under conditions that are far from ideal, and this requires some resolve. 

I was fortunate in my most recent recovery, which was nearly 22 years ago. I left the psych ward in a condition of still being delusional and psychotic, but back on medication and behaving myself. My then fiancé (now wife, 21 years) took care of me. I spent numerous hours every day, for about six months, trying to figure out my mind. I was at liberty to do this because my living situation, at the time, was undemanding and permitted this. 

Environment matters. For example, based on what I've gathered from news reports, conditions in the Contra Costa jail system are extremely stressful, due to overcrowding, and doubtless because, in general, jails are harsh environments. Yet, mentally ill people comprise a large portion of the population there. 

Environment matters--and you cannot simply give someone a mouthful of pills every day and assume this will make the person better. If you are incarcerated or homeless, or if you live in an institutional setting that has harsh conditions, getting your mind back together could be a very tall order, one that is out of reach for many persons afflicted with mental illness. 

At least for those who are not incarcerated or homeless, but who still live in a less than ideal situation, I suggest an adjustment to your environment--one that most people can make. This is to set aside two hours a day in which to do journaling. Ideally, your journaling time slot does not have interruptions. 

You can set up your journaling sessions any way you'd like. There isn't a problem if you sit in a comfortable chair, or if you lean back and stretch periodically. In addition, you can have refreshments by your side. There is no rule for what you'd like to write and think about, so long as the writing doesn't include a threat to anyone. This is the ideal time and place in which, if you choose to do so, you can learn more things about your mind, and about the world in which you live. 

This is a change to environment, which you have initiated. As a human being with the ability to schedule your time, you have a choice, to an extent, about what your environment looks like. We may not have a choice about our basic living situation. However, almost inevitably, we have some free time. We can use that time to do exercises in which the "internal environment" becomes better. 

Internal environment is as important as external environment. To an extent, we can change how we process the sensory data. We can change our thoughts for the better. 

If the mind is in the habit of churning out negative and depressing thoughts, or if the mind is stuck on semi psychosis, it may require some effort to get the mind off of those tracks and onto something better. 

To accomplish this, it is necessary to have a basic understanding of what people have already done, for many years (in some instances thousands of years), to improve their minds. Some reading on the subject is a must. If you don't like the idea of studying Buddhism or an Americanized spinoff of it, such as the writings of Ken Keyes Jr., you may want to investigate DBT, short for "Dialectical Behavior Therapy." (I am halfway through reading a short manual on that system. It seems good.) 

If the external environment in which you live isn't to your liking, and/or is caustic, you can learn to create a better internal environment that gives you some insulation from the external. 

However, environment matters, no matter how much we may teach ourselves to reinterpret it. When someone speaks and you hear it, the words go into your mind and affect your brain, to some extent--maybe a little, maybe a lot. When someone plays loud obnoxious music, it affects us. When someone threatens us, it affects us. 

This is why monasticism, whether you're talking of Buddhist-type, Christian, or other, necessarily involves a great deal of quiet. You can not get your mind to go to high and lofty places if you live under demanding and overstimulating conditions. There are meditation practitioners who have taken a vow of never speaking. Their verbal communication apparently is limited to writing on a chalkboard or on paper. 

Personally, I've obtained my peacefulness wherever and whenever I could find it. I have limited choices, but I am at liberty most days to spend some time thinking and/or writing. When I give that to myself as a gift, it brings a better mood, and it releases tension. 

If you decide to do journaling, you do not need to share what you write with anyone; the material may be none of anyone else's business. 

After about fifteen years of journaling, I got much of the garbage thinking out of my head and onto paper. This freed my mind so that I could begin to write for publication. 

What I have suggested in the above paragraphs, in part, is studying yourself. Secondly, you are setting aside time to pay attention to yourself. Many people do not have this--it might have never occurred to most people to try such a thing. You ought not have any guilt over setting aside time for something that critical people would consider useless, or an activity that even your own self-criticism could stop you from doing. 

If people think it is okay to sit like a vegetable in front of a television, then certainly it is okay to spend time actively paying attention to yourself and studying yourself. 

The above worked well for me, yet may not work for everyone. Some mental health professionals or family may feel that you should be focusing on things outside of yourself to get better. This is also valid. Maybe you can have both. These are only suggestions.